Monday, August 20, 2007

Terror

Posted by Lisa


At times, when I've driven through mountains (picture Vermont, California), I feel complete terror. My hands on the steering wheel sweat within seconds taking hold. My eyes are frozen before me, seeing nothing but the image of my car crashing down the cliff beside me. It is the feeling of a roller coaster drop - a feeling I used to enjoy.


Yesterday, I had the chance to go on an amusement park ride. It's been a couple years, but I've never been one to say no to the excitement of that gravity induced free fall. It was a water type ride, a splash waiting for me at the end when it climbs a mountain, then plunges.

What went through my mind at the time of the fall? Writing. That's what. Can you believe it? I suppose I can. The problem, I determined upon reflection on the drive home, is that writing is not a sure thing. Though I am using a cliche in saying this, writing is a roller coaster ride. The lows. The highs. You know what I'm talking about.

I'm curious, almost, to see where I end up. To glimpse into the future and see what books will bear this author's name. It's a plummet. It's a leap of faith. When you decided to be a writer - if you've truly made that commitment in your life - then you know that you are driving close to the edge of that mountain road. Each day may bring moments of terror, when you wonder if you will slip and plummet, or if you will make it to the end of your drive. One piece, whole, intact, a dream realized.

Like a roller coaster ride, once you've committed, it's pretty hard to turn back. So don't. Really. Don't turn back.

4 comments:

kristen said...

Yes, not a chance. There is no turning back, despite the challenging terrain ahead. Thank you for this.

As for the amusement park ride? I think I'll skip that freefall. I remember the terror all too well--you are a brave one.

Lisa said...

I think I had more of a sense of fear before committing. Now, it feels a little more like the nervous anticipation I used to feel when traveling by rail in Europe. Not quite sure what the journey would bring, but loving every minute of it :)

iyan and egusi soup: said...

how true, and inspiring! and there's something so exciting about not ever turning back.

Larramie said...

It's impossible to turn back. Seriously, have you ever seen a roller coaster in reverse? ;)